What more do you plan to get out of life?

i have the worst type of depression- circumstantial so its not like I can take pure mdma and fix a chemical imbalance (lack of serotonin) i don't have. Earth feels like "been there done that". What more can I really get out of a life where there is more room for error than not and the juice is rarely worth the squeeze. And the more that there is to get, will it be worth all the sacrifices needed? Is working two or three jobs to feed the family worth it if you're never there to see them smile? Im 25 going on 60, have had every resource a human could ask for- love , food, material things, employment but it all seems to be jaded, repetitive and unappealing considering that there is only so much a human mortal can obtain or not on planet earth. So why scratch a living in a war, poverty, and disease infested planet to make ends meet only to be subject to destruction (expiration) no matter what we do? What more do you expect or plan to get out of life?